Unrequited
by ViscountessKiera
Summary: Sometimes all you need is a little unrequited love to help you find what you're truly looking for, and Umi couldn't be more grateful.


**AN:** Look at me adding a new story, sorry Ice and Snow peoples, but this one just wouldn't leave me alone until I finished it. So yes if you didn't notice, this story is rated 'M' so yea no kiddies here, mature content ahead. Royalbk isn't the only one who can write good smut, xD. I've written mature content stories before, but I've never posted them here before, so I'm a little nervous. This is mostly a a response to the fact there's really no place in Ice and Snow for something this...heavy, it would have weighted that story down. This story is a bit of a throw up between the manga and the anime and I don't know if I've ever mentioned but in most of my stories the knights are all 16 plus, so yea. Enjoy the story.

_I know a lot about love. _

_I've seen it, seen centuries and centuries of it, and it was the only thing that made watching this world bearable. All those wars. _

_Pain, lies, hate... Made me want to turn away and never look down again. _

_But to see the way that mankind loves... _

_I mean, you could search to the furthest reaches of the universe and never find anything more beautiful. _

Sigh.

Umi shivered, feeling goose bumps rise where the night air licked at her bare, sweat moistened skin, but she didn't mind, her body was warm where it touched his. Tangled together as they were in the cool grass, in one of the many secluded gardens of the palace she couldn't help but let her mind wonder over just how she'd gotten here, to this moment.

A. She'd just lost her virginity.

B. The man sleeping next to her was not who'd she'd imagined it would be only a few months ago.

C. This had all started with a sparing match.

Okay, the last part wasn't entirely true, in reality this has started months ago with an unrequited love confession on her part, but she digressed.

At the time she had finally worked up enough nerve to tell Clef how she'd felt, how she still, in a small way felt, even though she knew from the start that he didn't think of her that way.

But to her not telling him was the same a lying to him and she didn't want to do that.

She had known it would hurt to hear his answer, but the pain still overwhelmed her and she'd run into one of the gardens, similar to the one she was in now, for refuge.

And that was where the man who'd just made love to her had found her or perhaps she had found him, she wasn't sure which. He'd been napping in a tree when she'd come into the great room, open to the pale evening sky.

It had just started to look like rain and he was about to make his way back inside when she came through the trees to drop down in grass, unable to hold back her tears. She wiped her arm furiously over her eyes but the tears kept coming and as if in some odd form of comfort the sky opened up and the rain came pouring down. The cold drops obscuring her tears and making them impossible to see.

Then suddenly the rain was gone. She glanced to the side to see a pair of booted feet and a familiar heavy cream cloak.

Looking up she swallowed down a sob and meet a pair of warm gold eyes. He was standing there in the rain beside her steadily becoming sopping wet. "You're an idiot." she managed to sniffle out.

He didn't say anything, but gave her a small, sad smile.

If it'd been anyone else she would have thought their sympathy for her meaningless, but not him. His compassion was genuine for she knew he too had felt the sting of an unrequited love.

Just thinking about the rejection had made her tears return, with a quiet sob she had leaned against him. One of his warm hands came to rest against the side of her face, gently pressing her against his side, and he stood in the rain with her for a long, long time.

A quiet, content sigh brought Umi back from her thoughts. She smiled gently at the sleeping man next to her. The slightest of smiles touched his face, in the moonlight his pale blond hair looked nearly silver.

Reaching quietly, so not to wake him, for he still slept a great deal, she lightly combed his hair back, brushing it out of his closed eyes. Suddenly the arm around her tightened and brought her closer to him.

It was strangely new, this feeling of lying wrapped up in his arms this way. She was a little sore, but the ache from her body's earlier exertion didn't really bother her, it left her feeling remarkably content, like she hadn't felt in ages.

Perspiration laced the top of his brow, even in the cool night air they'd worked up a sweat while they were dueling and then…well their second activity of the night certainly hadn't been any cooler of an activity, not that they'd exactly planned it that way.

'None of this had been planned really, it'd just sort of happened,' she thought.

It had started off innocent enough, their dueling. Not long after he'd found her in the garden after her confession to Clef, she'd gone to him, asked if he'd like to spar with her. For the practice would keep her mind on something else and would be good for his recovery.

He'd agreed, with that gentle smile of his.

Over the next few months as time passed and they spent more time together, they came to a quiet understanding. From their shared and similar pain was born a friendship.

As for their mock fights, that became something of a spectator sport for the other castle residence.

On occasion the others would join them, but it was never quite as good of a show. He and Lantis were pretty evenly matched, he being only slightly faster than the dark haired Cail, so it always ended in a battle of brut force. The same went for when he and Hikaru dueled. While she was nimble her fighting style had always relied on her strength and Hikaru would never have the agility that she had, and she could say that without being smug. It was fact.

So that always left her to fight him, sheer speed verses strength and some agility for he was also pretty quick on his feet. A lot of times the others would just watch from the sidelines cheering them on, but then on occasion when they could they'd steal away to a empty garden and duel alone; only the two of them and the ringing echoes of metal on metal.

It had been one of their previous duels that had led to this night. It had started out the same as always, but at the same time he seemed distracted, as if his thoughts were else where, and there was a tension in his gaze that she couldn't quiet understand or identify.

Then swiftly he'd pinned her, knocking her sword away, she'd ended up with her back to the wall, panting for breath. The fact that she'd lost never even crossed her mind, she was too busy lost in his eyes. He was staring down at her, his expression serious, as if he had made some decision.

She started to speak and ask him what was wrong, but the words never got the chance to leave her mouth.

Suddenly his sword slid from his hand to be forgotten on the ground and his mouth was on hers. His lips were warm and his hands steady, but she found herself frightened of the rawness in his kiss. She could taste his hunger, the passion behind his sudden act and she didn't know if she was frightened because of it or frightened that he might stop. A gentle mummer of his name escaped her mouth. She wondered if this is what it would be like to kiss Clef.

Just as her hands tightened on his shirt he pulled away, just a few inches, and searched her gaze and then stepped away from her entirely. "Why?" she managed to find her voice.

"Because, I want you say my name and mean it and I want you to look and me and not think of him." He reached forward to stroke her cheek and she'd turned her face away, his words stung. "I know what I'm asking isn't easy, perhaps harder for you than it is for me. For I did not nurture my unrequited love for as long as you did, but…in all honesty would you want me to hold you, love you and yet be thinking of Hikaru instead of you?"

Here she'd let her chin fall, her eyes to the ground, guilt like a heavy stone in her stomach, because she knew her answer would be no.

He reached out to her again and this time she didn't move away, cupping her chin he gently made her look up. "I know this is sudden and perhaps foolish of me to feel this way, but I…" here he seemed to choose his words carefully. "I want to know if we've both been overtaken by the same foolishness, that if I give you something of myself…" here he moved closer to her again and caught her eyes with his. "I'll get something in return. I don't want to be left empty handed again. A sentiment I'm sure you can understand."

Her heart raced as she fully understood what he was asking of her, her mouth went dry. She tried to formulate some sort of reply but he seemed to sense her struggle and touched a finger to her lips.

"You don't have to answer me just now, but I would like one from you and unfortunately time is of the essence." He smiled gently and withdrew from the garden, leaving her feeling stunned and very, very confused.

She'd laid awake all that night wrestling with her feeling and his words. She felt something for him yes? He was her friend at the very least, but was he…more?

Instead of trying to figure that out first she tried to take into consideration how she felt about what he said. No matter how he'd said it in so many words, he…well he had basically said he loved her. She mulled over this point, that wasn't as hard to come to grips with as what she felt for him was.

He loved her.

Strangely her heart fluttered at the idea.

Now for the hard part.

Did she love him back?

She prayed for some kind of answer.

_So, yes, I know that love is unconditional. But I also know it can be unpredictable, unexpected, uncontrollable, unbearable and strangely easy to mistake for loathing, and... _

_What I'm trying to say, is… I think I love you._

She rose late that day without much sleep, normally she'd met him for a match about this time but just thinking about it made her nervous. After getting dressed she found her way to Fuu's room where she'd joined her and Hikaru for afternoon tea.

"Are you alright Umi?" Fuu had asked worriedly as she sipped her drink.

She looked up with bleary eyes at the blond, "Yea, I just didn't sleep very well."

"Did you have a bad dream?" Hikaru asked.

She'd shook her head no.

"Well I hope you sleep better tonight, the transport ships from Autozam are arriving tomorrow." Fuu commented.

"Yea, we'll have to get up early to see them off." Hikaru sighed.

"Transport…?" She suddenly had a sinking feeling and with a sudden onset of clarity she knew exactly what he'd meant when he'd told her, _"time is of the essence." _Her cup let out a sharp clink as she nearly dropped it on the table.

"What's wrong Umi?" Hikaru jumped startled by her sudden movement.

"Oh…uh nothing I just…forgot something. I'll see you guys later." She dashed out the door and down the hall.

He was already there when she reached the garden, leaning against a tree, his sword beside him. To the casual observer he was the picture of calm, but anyone who knew him could see the tightness in his shoulders and the anxiousness that smoldered in his eyes.

"You're late." He said quietly.

She gulped and stood frozen like a deer caught in headlights, fear paralyzing her heart and words, where was the courage that had made her a Magic Knight now?

He pushed away from the tree retrieving his weapon, "Shall we?"

Shaking herself from her stupor she woodenly drew her sword. What was her answer, she had to answer him, she just couldn't leave things hanging between them like this. He was leaving…why hadn't he told her? Why had he chosen now to do this, why? She shook her head viciously, her fear and frustration suddenly boiling over into anger.

She'd struck with unusually ferocious blows, metal hit metal again and again until she disarmed him. When his sword hit the ground he was panting and her needle sharp sword point was underneath his chin, her body shaking with exertion and fury. "Why?" she'd finally managed but her fury subsided some with the guilty look he gave her, why was he looking at her like that?

Only then had she realize the tears gathering in her eyes, he felt guilty for upsetting her.

Good, he should feel bad!

But then why did that make her feel worse?

She dropped her sword and her arm fell limp by her side. "Why didn't you tell me you were leaving? Why didn't you ask…?" but she stopped, even if he had asked her sooner it wouldn't have made answering him any easier.

He reached forward hesitantly, regret in his amber gaze, and seeing that she didn't object, pulled her into his arms. "I'm sorry." He'd murmured into her hair, "Would you believe me if I said it took me that long to work up the courage to tell you?"

He'd been frightened too? Her hands reached up and latched onto the front of his shirt. "I…" she tried to give him an answer, she didn't want to hurt him, she didn't want him to be in pain, she wanted him to smile and she didn't want him to leave… and if she felt that way… that meant…it meant…

She'd turned her gaze up to his.

Gold bore down into blue.

"I think…I love you." she whispered.

He smiled and it was the most beautiful thing in the world.

"I was hoping you would say that."

She let her forehead drop to his chest and laughed weakly. "You're an idiot."

"So I've been told." He lent down, his soft bangs brushing her skin, and nudged her gently to make her raise her head. When she did her mouth was quickly his.

Her hands quickly tangled in his pale blond hair, a soft moan followed by a light gasp escaped her as his lips left her mouth and found sensitive a place on her throat and his hands slid down her body. One slid behind her and pressed against the small of her back, his thumb stroking a bit of bare skin. His other hand held her hip and pulled her forward, pressing every curve of her body against his.

"Eagle…" she gasped as she felt the rush of blood to her ears and her heartbeat immediately skyrocketed. His mouth was somewhere behind her ear, a soft, warm, wet kiss. Her warm little hand slid down and pressed hard against his back, fingers biting into the fabric. He groaned and returned to catch her lips again.

He pulled away, pausing for a moment to catch his breath. Hers was coming in quick little gasps and his large warm cheek rested against hers, hot breath tickled her ear and stirred a few wayward strands of hair. He turned and rested his forehead against hers and gazed down at her for a long moment, dark amber eyes stormy and hungry.

That gaze asked her many questions and she really didn't have the strength or desire to say no to them. In answer she pressed herself closer to him and kissed him again, trying to say with her mouth what words had failed too.

Apparently he got the message.

The hand on her back slid beneath her shirt and slid around, his long fingers raking over the smooth skin of her stomach. She shivered and reached up her hands latching onto his shoulders. A few tugs later and her nimble fingers pulled lose his cloak and it fell noiselessly into the long grass.

His movements were slow, gentle, she wasn't sure if he was trying to be gentle for her sake, or was trying to prolog the moment but either way he was driving her mad and the steady ache building in her body was growing stronger by the moment. She whimpered her frustration as his kisses slid down, caressing her collar bone and dipped dangerously below her blouse.

More, just what ever he was doing, just…oooh…. more of it…

Her hands latched onto his shirt and pulled it lose and then over his head as he raised his arms up for her. His smooth, pale skin was free for her fingers to roam over and her blouse quickly followed his shirt to the ground. His arms wrapped around her once more, pressing her small stomach to his. A quick dip of his arm and her feet were pulled out from under her and he lightly set her down on his discarded cloak.

She fell back without much guidance and tugged him down with her. The warmth of his thighs on either side of her hips nearly doubled her ache for him. His lowered his head once more, trailing light kisses, almost caresses, down her neck and between her breasts, his soft hair tickling her skin, she shivered as goose bumps rose on her flesh.

Oh dear God…

Her body arched up against his as his hands slid up her thighs and pulled her stockings down and then hooked a thumb in her skirt, pulling it away. She could feel the warmth he radiated, his stomach low and pressed against hers, with every move he made she could feel the ripple of the strong muscles beneath his skin.

"Eagle…" She gasped his name breathlessly, squirming in anticipation, she could feel him hard against her. In a few seconds the last of their clothing was gone and there was nothing between them but moonlight. Her body quivered with every touch and every kiss, he caressed every bit of skin with his lips he could find.

"Mmm…" she moaned, tangling her fingers in his thick hair as his lips found another new sensitive place below her breast.

The ache between her thighs was nearly unbearable, she wanted him, needed him, and she needed him now. Her hand slid down his back, nails scraping over his shoulder blades. He groaned and pressed down against her, arching her back she encouraged him, reveling in the growing friction between them.

His hands slid down her arms, taking her small hands in his he laced their fingers together, stretching their arms out above her head. He settled down between her thighs, holding his weight up on his elbows he gazed down at her, their noses almost touching with a bit of an apology in his heated amber eyes.

She understood, she knew what was coming, her mother had always been forthcoming about these kinds of discussions with her only daughter. "Don't stop…" she managed to beg, "Please…" she couldn't look away from that molten gold stare.

With a sudden quick thrust of his hips they were together.

She'd expected the pain, but she couldn't help but let out a strangled cry. Spots flittered across her sight, her gaze coming back into focus on his face. The fingers tangled into his soft hair at the base of his neck only gripped tighter.

He kissed her mouth again in an attempt to sooth her, she whimpered and felt herself tighten around him, he was gasping slightly as he pulled back and thrust again, his hot breath slid over her skin like warm silk.

She moved with him, pushing though the pain until it turned to warmth, and heat, searing delicious heat. "Yes, yes…" she thrashed side to side, her long hair wild and strewn about them.

His hips rolled again and she pressed herself up to meet him, this time she called out in pleasure, her breathing ragged, with every thrust she felt closer and closer to falling over some precipice, he pressed in again, throwing his head back with a husky groan.

His hands that were still tightly twined with hers suddenly relinquished their grasp, sliding along her thigh he hooked one of her legs up and around his waist. Her pale arms latched onto his shoulders trying to find some sort of grounding to hold onto, but all the same wanting him to push her over that edge.

He finally twisted his hips just so, filling that sweet ache within her, pressing into her with a sharp, deep stroke. Her vision blurred and went dark for a moment, crying out, her body arched upwards, shuttering, and she suddenly understood what her mother had meant when she called this moment 'a little death', for a brief second she couldn't move. Oh God…

His breath came and went in quick gasps, her name in quiet moans. "Umi…" It had never sounded better coming from anyone else's lips. She'd never felt or seen anything more lovely than his face in that moment of serene pleasure. His name fell over her lips in a trembling gasp as she tightened around him and felt his body shutter as he entered and filled her again.

In time their movements became slower, more loving and less frantic and he'd eventually withdrew from her rolling onto his side next to her. She'd caressed his face lovingly for a few moments before he rolled over onto his back and she scooted over, resting with her breasts pillowed on his chest.

For the longest while they'd laid there, just gazing at one another as she drew intricate patterns on the skin of his bare chest and they both caught their breaths.

Finally he tilted his head to the side and gave her a boyish grin, reaching for her he lightly ran his fingers though her hair. "You know…" he sighed and there was a playfulness in his tone, "I think I should have told you a lot sooner."

She didn't know whether to be annoyed with him or to just laugh at his boyishness, she found it hard to be annoyed with him, lying here against him while he smelled so good.

She settled for pinching his side gently, he chuckled.

"So is that a yes or a no?"

She shot him her best female glare possible from the angle she was laying against him at.

He smiled and reached for her pulling her down to his side, so their faces were beside each other. "I wish I had. Though could I ask you one last favor?"

"What's is it?" she asked, twirling the hair at the nape of his neck in her fingers.

"Say my name." He said quietly, his nose touching hers.

"Eh?" Her blue eyes blinked in confusion.

"My name, say it." He smiled.

She rolled her eyes, "Eagle."

"Oh come on, say it and mean it." He teased.

"Eagle Vision." She put a little heat behind her words, he smiled again, satisfied. Letting his head drop down beside hers.

After a few moments her slender finger reached up and brushed his bang away from his eyes, they dropped closed as she caressed his face. "Do you really have to leave?" she asked quietly.

He sighed his eyes sliding back open to gaze at her, he reached for her hand and brought it up to his lips to kiss her knuckles. "I'm afraid so, my duty to Autozam is not finished yet." He released her hand and stoked the soft skin of her shoulder, trailing his fingers down her side and then between her breasts.

"Oh…" she shuttered again, she tried to regain his attention, "How long will you be gone?" She found it a bit hard to remain focused on the subject at hand, while his hands were finding new places on her body to roam. She hadn't thought that possible, but he was defiantly proving her wrong.

His mouth was busy with her throat for a moment before he answered, "I don't know, but when I've finished my duty I shall return." He pulled himself up onto his elbows and gazed down at her in the long grass. "Will you wait for me?"

"Yes" she reached up and stroked his cheek fondly, smiling playfully, "As long as you don't make me wait too long."

He returned her playful smile rolling over gently so that she was beneath him once more, the passion relit in his eyes. "What happens if I do, my Lady?" his tone was slightly husky.

She turned her nose up in mock superiority, "I suppose you'll just have to make it up to me then." She felt on of his hands grip her thigh.

A naughty grin pulled at his lips, he lent down and whispered in her ear, "Perhaps I should take some precautions now to make sure my Lady is well kept while I'm gone?"

He didn't wait for her reply, he didn't need to.

So that was how she'd ended up here.

Lying in the long cool grass, with him sleeping soundly beside her.

Life sure has a funny way of surprising you.

She scrunched closer to him, snuggling into his warmth, he stirred but didn't wake.

All and all she couldn't help but feel grateful that all prayers for Clef to return her feelings hadn't been answered. If it hadn't been for that, or the fact he'd had some feelings for Hikaru, neither of them would have been here.

She yawned, her eyes felt heavy and started to drift shut, it was a peaceful feeling, lying here with him in the pale moonlight, the feeling of being loved, and somewhere in the back of her mind she couldn't help but thank God for unrequited love and unanswered prayers.

_My heart... It feels like my chest can barely contain it. _

_Like it doesn't belong to me any more. _

_It belongs to you. _

_And if you wanted it, I'd wish for nothing in exchange — no gifts, no goods, no demonstrations of devotion. _

_Nothing but knowing you loved me, too. _

_Just your heart, in exchange for mine._

_~Stardust~_

**An:** Hope you liked it, and I hope to get back to working on Ice and Snow real soon, that is if the Hikaru/Lantis fic I have bouncing around in my head doesn't take over first. Chow, love to my readers and reviewers.


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